Leelah asked me if I would be sharing my goals - to be honest I wasn't really going to because I was having a hard time with them... But after I started talking with my cousin Lauren, we both agreed it might be helpful to others to explain my year in review and what direction I am heading in for 2012.
Click to enlarge!
2011 was an interesting year for me... A few things that happened:
- Took hooping classes and felt great!!
- Tons and tons of work coming in! Probably the best workload I've had since I started freelancing!
- I had art in the Girls Drawing Girls book
- Showed work in Chubby Bunny's LA show and in Philly at an Autumn Society event
- Started my Love Letter posts
- Saw a few amazing live shows... Rooney, Eisley, Katy Perry, BB King...
- Met Betsey Johnson and Katy Perry! These were on my bucket list of "things to do before I'm 30" so that was super exciting and unexpected!
- Went to Florida twice to see my family
- Dyed my hair back to its natural color
- Went to NYC for the first time ever to see my friend Katie
- Attended New York Comic Con and worked at the Girls Drawing Girls booth
- Started a monthly comic in Magnet magazine!!
Overall, I feel like I had an amazing year when I look over photos and this list! Truthfully though, halfway through it a lot of the lofty 2011 goals I made had been scrapped because I had lost interest. Throughout the year I found that I wasn't very satisfied with my work anymore and was confused as to what would make me happiest now... I've always been a passionate hard worker, but I think I was running out of steam and due to my workload I stopped paying attention to my mental and physical health. I was in denial for a bit - I thought if I worked a little harder, then I'd get back on track and feel great! I didn't want to let anyone down, including my past self that wanted these goals - even if my future self didn't want them anymore.
Eventually, I hit a wall and realized I couldn't continue down this path. As much as I wanted to do my very best at illustrating along with having it all - love, family, friends, adventure, etc... I realized it's just not realistic with the amount of stress I can personally handle. Something had to give.
It was a hard decision for me, but I eventually decided to cut back on my work to focus on my health and family at the end of November and December. And I will be continuing that choice into 2012.
I think it's so easy to make goals based around what you *think* you want, only to find it wasn't as fulfilling as you had hoped after trying it out. However, I don't regret any of my decisions either since it's been a very exciting and challenging adventure for me. Freelancing for a living has further proved to me I can do just about anything I want if I put my heart into it. That is an amazing lesson and one I'm going to carry with me into the next chapter of my life. I'm viewing this as if I was changing companies for a new job vs cutting back on my dream. The dream has evolved into something more...
Hopefully sharing this will be a little helpful to anyone else who might be struggling with their goals. It's sorta a relief to finally share this actually... I find it's very easy to show only the positive side of things online and sweep the negative under the rug, which is ok at times - but can also give off a false image a "perfect life" if someone doesn't know you in person. I've had people comment to me that I seemed to have such a fun life and was so positive, which was hard for me to hear because I knew things were more complicated than that... and I'd hate to lead anyone along to think freelance work just shows up, and drawing for a living is *so* fun or my life is rainbows and sunshine all the time. (I think this comic sums up some of that very well.) Starting your own business and freelancing is hard work. I knew that going in, but after a period of time it became too much. It's been 2 years since I quit my full time job, and 3 years since I started doing freelance illustration... When I look at how much time has passed, I think its only natural for my career to evolve now for my well being. If I continued down the path I was heading, I would have never achieved what I'm learning are my true hopes and goals in life.
And on that note, here is my final inspiration board for 2012! Everything pinned on there is directly tied to my goals or inspiring me through things that make me happy. A few things pictured: A lovely illustration of myself by Danielle, fake photo strips of fun days, cute inspiring photos reminding me of things that make me happy, quotes I like, a toy camera to remind me to keep taking photos, pictures of my friends and family, a little piece of my pink hair when I trimmed bangs a while ago (kinda weird but I saved it to help me remember what shade I had!) - it's on there to remind me I can put pink back in if I want to! There is also some travel inspiration along with photos and drawings I made. A few things were found on the internet... "Be silly, be honest, be kind", various photos of famous people I like, this cute Disneyland illustration, and this vintage image of sewing.
So what exactly do I want to accomplish in 2012?
For the first time I'm looking at goal making differently! I'm grouping my ideas into categories and trying to keep it simple. I'm realizing there is less importance of a "START GO!" on January first to tackle a list for the rest of the year... and more so just to be self aware of small things you'd like to do first, and then just be open to life experiences and new ideas as they come along.
Travel
2011 zipped by me so fast that I didn't realize how few trips I took. This year I want to make sure traveling happens since it's something I really enjoy! A few trips I'm hoping will happen:
Happiness
Happiness is a tricky thing... What *is* happiness to me? I'm still figuring that out, and here are a few ideas I'm going to try to help me along the way:
- Get back to journaling/scrap booking with photos I've taken
- Visit local new and old places more - it's too easy to day dream about what is so wonderful in other cities. I want to fall in love with Atlanta again and enjoy what is to offer here!
- Spend more time with family/friends and maybe even make some new friends!
- Look into volunteer work or teaching, or find something equally meaningful and fulfilling
Health
Health often gets put on the back burner for me and I'm not sure why. So to fix that...
- Go to bed and wake up at a good hour. I want 2012 to be the year of better sleep! haha
- Exercise 5 times a week - either through walking, dancing, bike riding, or whatever!
- Eat healthier. I'm so bad about just eating whatever I please out of laziness and I'd like to learn more about eating healthier nutritious meals.
Career
- I still don't know what I'd like to do next on this, and right now I'm just focusing on the other 3 until I have made up my mind. However, one thing I am certain of is I'd like to give my blog a huge overhaul in the next few months - design wise and content wise. Hopefully, this will be as exciting for you guys as it is for me! I'm thinking I want to start writing about ideas to improve the quality of life for modern women inspired by knowledge from previous generations of women. I'm hoping to share ideas and small steps women can take on lifestyle, cooking, fashion, travel and self improvement to enhance their life as I too discover them for myself. I'll still be incorporating drawing on my blog, but in different ways that make me happier and serve a purpose.
Miscellaneous goals
A few random fun things that I'd like to see happen:
- Have a Halloween party! I haven't really celebrated the past few years due to conflicting events. It's one of my favorite holidays, and I figure if I host my own party then there is no excuse to not celebrate! ;) Plus, it's always something I've wanted to do!
- Swim more this summer
- Maybe put a few streaks of color back into my hair or get some clippy extensions in fun colors!
- Take my dog on more adventures - she needs to have more fun too, ya know!
I'm going to be changing a lot in my life during 2012, and while it scares me a little it also feels like the right next step. These goals give me hope that I'll be building a good foundation for lasting happiness and love for years to come. I'm excited about the possibilities and hope you guys will continue to join me along the way while I make positive improvements on my life! (And hopefully share some tips for you to do the same! ;D )
Did you make an inspiration board this year or any life changing goals? Let me know! <3
A few helpful links if you're still working on your goals...
